Misadventure Memoirs

We had so much fun tonight…in fact, our whole day was amazing, but 4 wheel driving and riding camels in the Sahara Desert to catch the sunset was the highlight for sure. Such an awesome experience.

I made the mistake of wearing my slides. Yes, it’s still those little slippy bastards…🙄 I haven’t had a chance to replace them yet (although there’s a chance I will at the market in Fez, which we’re visiting on Tuesday). 

Instead of operating like snowshoes, (as I had imagined they would) the turds sank right into the sand, so I took them off and went barefooted. Felt fabulous. When we got back, I whacked them together before putting them in my suitcase…a couple of kilos of sand sifted out onto our hotel room floor! I can’t wait to frisbee the useless effers into oblivion!!

Artfully tossing handfuls of sand for photos, I got heaps in my hair and, next morning, my ears were still full of it. We didn’t get back to our hotel from the desert until late and had dinner at 9.15pm, so I was too tired to wash my hair last night. Consequently, my head has felt itchy and gritty all day today. There’s a micro sand storm each time I scratch my scalp. 😂

I’m also suffering from Camel-rider-groin. Like a number of the others, I take the opportunity to do adductor stretches at our rest stops. Unlike all the others, I have camel snot on the my shirt collar from Col’s camel giving me an earlobe snuffle.

I have to take an opportunity to describe the antics of the annoying dickheads in our tour group… There’s Jangling Janice, who wears every silver bracelet she’s bought in her entire lifetime every day. This is somewhat of a bonus in disguise as it gives me the chance to exit, stage left, when I hear the jingle jangle! JJ just seems to be along on this trip to smoke and drink! 😳 she doesn’t participate in any trip activities and stays in the bus at most breaks…. Except if there are more super-cheap ciggies required to keep her going! Also, I can’t figure if she’s deaf or just super rude…She never responds to greetings or my convo prompts, rather looks right through me as if nothing just happened. Oxygen deprivation maybe?

Then there’s no margin for speculation, Rhonda Right! Whatever the subject, Rhonda won’t rest until the unequivocal truth is made known to all. I made the mistake of ordering the same juice as her at lunch today. Rhonda:. “What juice do you have?” Me: “apple”. Rhonda: “it’s not apple”.  Later in the restrooms “it was apple and orange”! Yeah, rightio Rhonda, suck the joy outta life why dontcha.

A few minutes later I reprimanded myself…Show some compassion you fool! Imagine the childhood that’s produced a person for whom being right is their complete raison d’être! 😳

Oh, and The Rhino’s lunch was “disgusting”! Burnt and dry apparently. Could hardly eat a mouthful. Left it. Now, if you saw The Rhino 🦏 you might draw the same conclusion that I have. The Rhino could eat underwater! (And would also have a go at anything that didn’t try to eat her first!). 😄

Ted the ex publican is a total tool. When we all arrived at our hotel in Erfoud, hot and dusty in the late afternoon, many of us donned our cozzies for a swim in the pool. Swimming and drinking are seldom a winning combination, but when Ted picked up a smallish, round mosaic topped table to move it into the shade for our drinks, thinking the top was attached to the wrought iron frame shit got real! That sucker was 8cm thick solid concrete and weighed a ton! It glanced across the back of his heel as it fell leaving a gash that bled profusely for some time. Luckily, it did not sever his Achilles tendon! 😳

We visited Todra Gorge on Sunday where there were hundreds of local people out enjoying the late summer sunshine and paddling in the water. Lots were camped out in shady areas and looked as though they may have been there all weekend…in fact, some encampments look semi-permanent. Curiously, there were men sound asleep on gravel banks in the middle of the river, covered with blankets. The water was crystal clear, clear enough for Col to dip the tin cup hanging from a string into a small pool and take several sips. However, upstream a flock of goats, a few donkeys and a couple of dogs were sipping, swimming etc! Yum.